yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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