we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
