i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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