Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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