Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
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I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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