You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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