she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
pop tarts are not kleenex
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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