everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
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At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
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The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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