Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
