is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
This can only be settled by a dance off.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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