she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
