so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
