he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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