this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
