Its about making memories worth repressing
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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