what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
