Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
