Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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