margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
