**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize