you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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