What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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