just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
