So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
