Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
