The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I don't think brook has ever known best
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
