He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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