i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
