we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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