Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
wow bdsm is so cute
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
