There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
im holly from the hills drunk
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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