Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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