Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize