I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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