I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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