Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
