And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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