I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
