Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
someone owes me an orgasm
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Randomize
