oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
