i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Randomize
