I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
