plz talk dirty to me
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
My hand turned me down
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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