O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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