Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I think I won the penis lottery.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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