so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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