'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
