Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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