hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
