it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
