Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
