if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
